For some inexplicable reason, I have always felt that life is like a labyrinth. It first occurred to me as I lay in a considerably depressed mood one afternoon when I was 14 or 15. It had inspired another artless poem at the moment, which incidentally I had scribbled behind a notebook which I am sure did not survive the test of time. And now, at yet another instant of my life, the same thought keeps coming back, that this life is in fact a huge fortress that has no discernible doors to the outside, but more doors to the innards.
Last Wednesday was my birthday. I am an year older now, and there are so many things that I so very much wish was not a part of my reality, but unfortunately they loom over me as stark as in daylight. I try closing my eyes at them, but they keep coming to me with their leering faces and lolling tongues. I try reasoning with myself and they shatter my train of thoughts. I have thus reached a state of mind where I no longer know what I really need. I wanted to see the world, not just from books which I held in my hands while curled up on a chaise lounge, but for real. I yearned and still am thirsty for knowledge of realms unknown to my humble thoughts. I dream of one day being able to become the center point from which love shall be spread far and wide. It is so much like being trapped in a giant maze.
Now, I have reached a stage in this maze where I am at a junction from which so many doors open in all directions. I am not at the center of the fortress where contentment awaits me in a pot, but far from it. I want to reach the main hall where all that happiness awaits me. But am totally clueless as to which door to take. So far in my stumblings along these long corridors of life, I have come across rooms with dazzling interiors and dungeons with the most despicable creatures inhabiting them. I have stepped through filth and flowers and have many more steps and wrong turns to take until I get to the right door. Future holds promises. Past holds experiences. Yet, today is a conundrum at the junction of a maze trying to find out the right door to open.
Along the corridors there are people whom I met so far. Some people are way ahead of me and some have nearly solved it and found their pot of contentment, many have perished in the dungeons and some have become so yellow eyed at the opulence is some of the rooms and have decided to stay on and not go further. the corridors are ever busy and people flow in all directions, yet I am standing without having an inkling about the door which I have to take. So I am now a peeping Tom, trying to take a sneak peek into every door and see as far as I can so that I can decide to take the one that most appeals to me………